Where am I ?

My first “second home” is the Confucius block of Inti’s hostel on September 2008. That’s where I had my own living space besides Seremban. I started to make more friends from different places, Pakistanis, Nigerians, people from China and all over Malaysia. I learned to become independent, going to classes everyday and punctually, do assignments and hand up on time, study for test and do my best in the exams.

After that semester, I moved to Desa Palma and that’s my second “second home” which I’m still staying till now. I love being tidy, and I clean my room like every 2 – 3 days. Still remember the second week, when I was supposed to go to hang out with friends at Alamanda but end up hitting the club, with just singlet, shorts and sandals but it was a fun night as well. Weeks after, I joined the DAC club and at the gathering night, I met a special someone who became my boyfriend within a month. Whose love stories are not sweet initially? We spent most of our days and nights together. Being in love, kiss , hugs , intimacies, arguments , get jealous over lil things, chatted for hours when we’re about to sleep. Love just has it ups and downs. Unfortunately, our love is not strong enough and it leads to break up a year after. Betrayals are painful, but he’s forgiven because of love but things did not go well. Things become complicated and torture both of us. That’s when I grew up. Thanks to him.

But sometimes, I’m just being too stubborn. Determinations aren’t strong enough, end up hurting my own feelings. Anyhow, I’m still an optimist, knew myself can get over the pain in awhile. I trust myself. Whatever that I miss about is him is just because I used to love him a lot and for whatever that we’ve done in the past. Those memories are somehow beautiful and ignore the ugly ppart.

After he left, I joined Social Board. I get to know even more friends. Most of them are younger than I do, but they’re just too jovial and keep me distracted from being sad for him leaving. We work together as a team and do the best for O’Nite and go crazy and get high in clubs.

I used to hate alcohol and fags but they’ve become part of my obsession now. I don’t blame others for what I am today but they’ve become one of the socialize tools but it doesn’t mean that I’m using them to impress someone to get me fit in their group but it’s just better. I’ve tried to drink lesser so that I can smoke lesser but there’s always temptation. I’m just giving my excuses perhaps but if there’s ever another special someone who walk into my life and wanted me to give up fagging, I will for his sake :p

I’m still looking for the old me, back in September 2008. Where am I ?


biibuu ♥